I feel like selfies are kind of the elephant in the room for our generation. Since snapchat blew up, selfies are becoming less of a statement and more of an understanding. But still, selfies are a huge part of media presence and have revolutionized millennials entirely.
There’s 2 kinds of people in this world. We have the selfie queen who doesn’t give AF how many she takes or who sees her taking them. Whether you love her or hate her, this bitch has no shame. And then there’s the, “ummmm…I don’t take selfies” person. They fail to elaborate on why they don’t take selfies, but they act like selfies are beneath them.
Truth: I used to be the second one.
I don’t think I knew at the time why I wasn’t a selfie girl, but looking back, I understand now.
My non-selfie-taking mindset looked a little something like this.
Selfies are messy. They make me look like I try too hard. That I’m an attention whore. Or maybe it makes me look like I’m so insecure and have such low self esteem that I need affirmation from others. They reveal too much. They give people the chance to look at me however long they want and find flaws and judge me until the cows come home. Ultimately, a selfie is a statement that give people the opportunity to make assumptions and judge me. And I don’t want to get into all that, so I’m staying away from selfies. It’s not worth it to me.
These are the real reasons I felt at the time before I took selfies. This was my mindset.
Notice anything about my thoughts…oh, I don’t know…maybe that EVERYTHING I focused on had to do with OTHERS. How others thought. The way others saw me. What others would say. I thought about everyone else in the world, except for myself.
I let others dictate my place in this world and allowed them to hold me back from being my authentic self.
Soon enough, I was in a different place in my life and dun-dah-dah-dahhh, my first selfie was taken, edited, and posted on IG (still there FYI). Boom.
I don’t know where my head was when I did that. Honestly, because volleyball had just ended, I was probably a little lost and unsure of my place and worth, so I was exploring new horizons. But regardless, I did it and actually…..I kind of liked it.
I liked the pic of me enough to post it, so that was a good start. Then my likes and comments started blowing up with people saying such sweet, supportive things. It felt good seeing love from others, not in a needing-affirmation way, but in a proud-of-where-I-am-and-where-I’ve-been way.
They say selfies are like tattoos (actually I just made that up, but I think it works here). They’re addicting, and once you do it one time, you want to do it again and again. As my IG feed clearly reveals, I fell hard into the selfie phenomenon.
Guess what I learned.
A selfie isn’t about how others see you (or it shouldn’t be at least). It’s entirely about how you see yourself and the relationship you have with yourself. It’s about having the confidence to flip the camera around and have some fun. To not take yourself, or life for that matter, so seriously. To feed that inner model you’ve always wondered if you could be. To enhance creative thinking and imagination.
A selfie is a form of expression that exudes confidence, not insecurity.
Tell me, when you’re talking to a guy and you look his ex gf up on IG and she has these bomb ass selfies, what goes through your head? I can tell what goes through mine, and it’s “damn, okay I see her. She looks good and she knows it. Okay, yeah, I’m a little intimidated.”
Now tell me that isn’t true! I know you’ve all felt this way at least once before. So if you’re an over-thinker and sometimes hesitate in chances to reveal your authenticity, think about your ex’s new whatever girl and what you want her to see when she’s creeping on you.
Exuding confidence tends to have a ripple effect I’ve noticed. Not only will your selfie boldness probably inspire someone else to do it too, it will likely give you more confidence to do something else you’ve been scared to do before. Which will again, continue building your self confidence and allow you to learn about your truest self.
Selfies have changed our lives and are more metaphorically meaningful to us than we realize.
At the end of the day, when it’s all said and done, there’s you and your soul. Do what feeds your soul, discover your authenticity, and own it loud and proud for everyone to see. Because everyone else is already taken and no one can ever take away what makes you, you.
Never knew selfies could get so deep, huh? I hope this gave you a new perspective and inspired you all to say fuck it and just live your life. Showing the world who you truly are is the best gift a person can give, so don’t waste any time hiding.
May you all be bold, brave, confident, beautiful, soulful, genuine, real, and most importantly, authentic.